Confidence. Check?
By Nina Ashe, SexyPlus Clothing Blogger
My dear ladies… we’ve established that confidence is sexy. Yes? Yes.
Will repeating “I have confidence” in front of your mirror like a monotonous mantra make it so? No. No.
You got to have guts, mamitas… the kind you trust and the kind you display for the world to see.
Let Miss Nina give you a few simple suggestions… daily challenges, if you will… that will assuredly go a great length into helping you ascertain that sexy confidence. What’s the harm? What have you got to lose? Self-esteem you might not already possess?
Trust me, these practiced steps will let your true self-esteem shine:
1. Posture. Seriously. Yes, ladies… mind your posture already!! Aren’t any of you listening? I’m talking to all ya’ll, from the slacking minis to the slouching maxis. What gives? Your mothers and grand-mothers were all right. Posture: standing up straight, lengthening your neck, sliding your shoulders back, and pointing the girls upwards and outwards. This outrageous little trick will really do wonders for literally making you feel taller. Taller in height and taller in spirit. It will also bring you to eye-level to those around you. Which brings me to #2.
2. Eye contact. Yup. Gotta do it. Gotta look people straight on. No choice. No other way around it. You wanna feel and believe you that you are worthy of being looked at (which yes yes yes you are!), then you have to look at people. Not their chest or their butts (though there is always time for that), not their bags or their shoes, and especially not your own shoes. Make eye contact a daily priority and challenge. And then you can work on “how” you look at people. You can perfect the intent later… but for now, just looking them straight on, thinking about whatever you need to to keep said contact and see if they will look back. You’ll get a myriad of responses: curiosity, annoyance, suspicion, pleasure, disgust, and even bald-faced lust. That is, if you even get people who will look up in the first place. And that’s when you’ll realize, you weren’t the only person lacking confidence, esteem or happiness… and that all those people who do not want to meet your eye now think you are better than them simply because you dare look up at the world and face it.
3. Walk. Like you own the world and yourself. Not like you’re hoofing it double-time to make it to the dentist, not like you have that proverbial stick up your backside, and definitely not like a scaredy-cat scurrying away into a corner. Walk like a Queen at her inauguration, like a crowned Miss Universe minus the tears, like a strutting diva who knows she’s got it going on. I myself honestly do enter the most pack-filled rooms – parties, clubs, job interviews - like I’m hosting a party and everyone is there for me. I kid you not. I will say it a few times beforehand – “They are all here because of me and for me. Without me this “party” wouldn’t be happening.” Boy does it work! I’m not saying you’re never in a hurry to get somewhere, but most times, do take a step back, do not fall in line with the crowd, and see the world around you. You’ll not even notice how relaxed your gait is, how easily you can maintain your posture, and, of course, how much easier it is then to look people in the eye.
4. Smile!! Not only does it relax the muscles in your face… but it relaxes people around you. You seem more interesting and alive when you smile… we all do. And as tacky as it sounds, pasting a smile on your face even when you just wanna crumple will raise you up inch by inch. It’ll start out as this crooked weird little grin… but much like riding a bike, with enough practice, you’ll be perma-smiling in no time! People are fascinated with those who smile on the street. I have my most interesting conversations with strangers simply because they ask why I’m smiling such. It boggles my mind every time that we should live in a world now where smiling is the beautiful exception. Well, ladies, be an exception along with me. Think of something funny or cute – I often think of how I prance around in my shoes at home by myself – and just smile for the pleasure and benefit of it.
5. Practice Practice Practice. Till it becomes second nature… till it becomes you! A fierce eccentric beautiful happy woman, who faces life straight on, tits first, with a smile on your face and a step that seems to indicate she’s strolling a sunny boardwalk. Start at home… practice your smile in front of the mirror… happy smile, funny smile, flirty smile. Who cares about crooked teeth? They give character to your unique face! Strut around your house, shoulders back and see how it feels. Do imagine that you are the Queen of England and even do that silly little wave. You’ll see how that makes you smile!!
Most importantly: just have fun with it! Life is seriously much too short to fret about everyone and everything.
My dear ladies… we’ve established that confidence is sexy. Yes? Yes.
Will repeating “I have confidence” in front of your mirror like a monotonous mantra make it so? No. No.
You got to have guts, mamitas… the kind you trust and the kind you display for the world to see.
Let Miss Nina give you a few simple suggestions… daily challenges, if you will… that will assuredly go a great length into helping you ascertain that sexy confidence. What’s the harm? What have you got to lose? Self-esteem you might not already possess?
Trust me, these practiced steps will let your true self-esteem shine:
1. Posture. Seriously. Yes, ladies… mind your posture already!! Aren’t any of you listening? I’m talking to all ya’ll, from the slacking minis to the slouching maxis. What gives? Your mothers and grand-mothers were all right. Posture: standing up straight, lengthening your neck, sliding your shoulders back, and pointing the girls upwards and outwards. This outrageous little trick will really do wonders for literally making you feel taller. Taller in height and taller in spirit. It will also bring you to eye-level to those around you. Which brings me to #2.
2. Eye contact. Yup. Gotta do it. Gotta look people straight on. No choice. No other way around it. You wanna feel and believe you that you are worthy of being looked at (which yes yes yes you are!), then you have to look at people. Not their chest or their butts (though there is always time for that), not their bags or their shoes, and especially not your own shoes. Make eye contact a daily priority and challenge. And then you can work on “how” you look at people. You can perfect the intent later… but for now, just looking them straight on, thinking about whatever you need to to keep said contact and see if they will look back. You’ll get a myriad of responses: curiosity, annoyance, suspicion, pleasure, disgust, and even bald-faced lust. That is, if you even get people who will look up in the first place. And that’s when you’ll realize, you weren’t the only person lacking confidence, esteem or happiness… and that all those people who do not want to meet your eye now think you are better than them simply because you dare look up at the world and face it.
3. Walk. Like you own the world and yourself. Not like you’re hoofing it double-time to make it to the dentist, not like you have that proverbial stick up your backside, and definitely not like a scaredy-cat scurrying away into a corner. Walk like a Queen at her inauguration, like a crowned Miss Universe minus the tears, like a strutting diva who knows she’s got it going on. I myself honestly do enter the most pack-filled rooms – parties, clubs, job interviews - like I’m hosting a party and everyone is there for me. I kid you not. I will say it a few times beforehand – “They are all here because of me and for me. Without me this “party” wouldn’t be happening.” Boy does it work! I’m not saying you’re never in a hurry to get somewhere, but most times, do take a step back, do not fall in line with the crowd, and see the world around you. You’ll not even notice how relaxed your gait is, how easily you can maintain your posture, and, of course, how much easier it is then to look people in the eye.
4. Smile!! Not only does it relax the muscles in your face… but it relaxes people around you. You seem more interesting and alive when you smile… we all do. And as tacky as it sounds, pasting a smile on your face even when you just wanna crumple will raise you up inch by inch. It’ll start out as this crooked weird little grin… but much like riding a bike, with enough practice, you’ll be perma-smiling in no time! People are fascinated with those who smile on the street. I have my most interesting conversations with strangers simply because they ask why I’m smiling such. It boggles my mind every time that we should live in a world now where smiling is the beautiful exception. Well, ladies, be an exception along with me. Think of something funny or cute – I often think of how I prance around in my shoes at home by myself – and just smile for the pleasure and benefit of it.
5. Practice Practice Practice. Till it becomes second nature… till it becomes you! A fierce eccentric beautiful happy woman, who faces life straight on, tits first, with a smile on your face and a step that seems to indicate she’s strolling a sunny boardwalk. Start at home… practice your smile in front of the mirror… happy smile, funny smile, flirty smile. Who cares about crooked teeth? They give character to your unique face! Strut around your house, shoulders back and see how it feels. Do imagine that you are the Queen of England and even do that silly little wave. You’ll see how that makes you smile!!
Most importantly: just have fun with it! Life is seriously much too short to fret about everyone and everything.
